Coming soon to a planet near you!

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Enraptured!

No discussion of apocalypse preparedness is complete without a stopover in the Book of Revelation, the last book in the Christian New Testament famous for its confusing account of angels and dragons duking it out in the end times.

Amid all the fever-dream imagery, the book forecast the return of Jesus Christ and the rapture of every last believer on Earth. According to some interpretations, this means that one day the son of God will return to Earth and all his followers will instantly ascend into heaven, leaving behind only sinners.

Of course, the first century text failed to nail down an exact date for the rapture, leaving countless people to speculate on it for going on two millennia. Most recently, California radio evangelist Harold Camping grabbed headlines with a billboard campaign warning of a May 21, 2011, rapture. When nothing happened, Camping announced that the apocalypse wouldn't begin in earnest until Oct. 21, 2011. Should this trend continue, you can expect rapture estimates to drag out well into 2012.

How to Prepare: Can you imagine how the rapture will affect rush-hour traffic? In case you're stranded (for any reason), the U.S. Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA) recommends you keep the following emergency supplies in your vehicle: food, water, first-aid supplies, flares, jumper cables and seasonal supplies (such as winter blankets).

Up next, we'll listen to the whispers of the bots.